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PBR Definitely N Perfect Harmony (Children's book)

PBR Definitely N Perfect Harmony
It was one of those moments at Plateau Breeze Ranch when you question what you are looking at. There, pinned under the chicken wire, was a gorgeous, fine-fleeced, spotted newborn. Her mother was nowhere to be found as I carefully pulled the wire to free her. Please don't catch her newborn skin on the wire, I pleaded. I wrapped her in a towel and carried her to a clean location, noticing no mother followed. OMG! This is going to be a long day, I thought, as I panicked a bit with the knowledge that this baby needed colostrum to survive. Slowly, her mother emerged with her long spiky hair covering her eyes. "She's a stoner", my husband often commented on her lackadaisical attitude. "Rod Stewart" my husband called her as he noted her hot legs and "Do you think I'm sexy" appeal as she made her way to the baby, smelled her and then laid down. Not exactly what I was hoping for as I heated a bottle of colostrum and fed this starving little wonder. I went to the house, looked at the clock and made a mental note that I needed to feed her again in two hours. The clock ticked forward as I watched the camera. There I saw what I would call a professional wrestler. The baby nudged her mother's chin with a strong push, nose to nose; she then jumped over her mom's back and back to her chin. Nudge, nudge, hey, I'm hungry!!! She swiped at Mom's ear, reminding me of a Mike Tyson move, but still no action. She continued to torment this lazy mother until Mom finally stood up. Baby headed between her back legs and ended up under her mom's front legs. She circled back and went for the prize but missed it and ended up on the other side of her mom's body. C'mon, baby! C'mon, baby! You can do it! I screamed at the camera. Mom was frozen while baby finally found what she was looking for and nursed for a solid five minutes while I watched with a heart full of happiness. Please meet our newest member to Plateau Breeze Ranch, "PBR Definitely N Perfect Harmony"!!!!!